Red October

This weekend we were invited to one of my wife’s Russian friend’s house for shashlik - kababs on the grill for us Americans. We drove for about an hour and finally arrived to hang out.

The woman was making salads when we arrived.  And the dog, we’ll change the names in order to protect the innocent. Did I say innocent? We’ll call the obnoxious small dog Fluffy. Now right away Fluffy was very friendly and enjoyed jumping up on your legs and scratching at us, begging for attention.

Fluffy

We got the grand tour of the house. Of course Fluffy followed along with us as we got the tour and he stopped to enjoy himself along the way. Now I understand most dogs would just stop and lick themselves, but not Fluffy. There was a big stuffed bear upstairs and the dog decided to use one of the bear’s legs for his personal enjoyment if you know what I mean…

So after the show, or tour that is, I sat down and cracked open a beer and waited. The husband was in the shower still, so I had to entertain myself while waiting for him. You know Russian women speak Russian when they get together and unless you speak it, you’re typically on your own.  So the husband finally comes out and says the traditional chit chat to everyone - hi, how are you, etc.

So the husband is telling this story about the cat and how Russians don’t have animals spayed or neutered (the cat came from Russia with the wife). So he’s telling the story about how the cat ended up getting his balls removed.  The funny thing was that Fluffy found a new pleasure post during that story - my leg. So this fur-ball of a dog latched onto my leg while he was telling the story of the cat getting its balls cut off. Apparently the dog still has his balls… Fluffy just kept humping away and I kept shaking him off of my leg. But as soon as I would get rid of him, he would walk around the chair to my other leg and start again! Now having pants on is one thing, but I was in shorts. Talk about a horror movie, this could turn out to be one if Fluffy don’t back off! This dog was about to go flying across the room, but everyone was in there. How to deal with that damn dog? How could I fling this fur-ball into the wall without offending everyone? But wait. Aren’t I the offended one? I finally got up and went outside with the husband to start the barbeque. But Fluffy came along. Fortunately for Fluffy (and me), he was preoccupied chasing a rabbit. I’d hate to think what the rabbit was in store for should he happen to catch it. Maybe a little rabbit love… So anyway, I got a reprieve.

The day went on and Fluffy behaved himself most of the time. Dinner was good, everyone got drunk and we went home. The moral of this story? Don’t wear shorts to a house you have never been to before. They might have a small dog named Fluffy.

This article isn’t necessarily about the untimely death of David Carradine, but more so about the press. This morning my wife made a very good observation. She read about David Carradine found dead news and selected several articles from USA sources and several from Russian sources.

What she found was that the details were different. Why would the details be different?

In the USA news, the guy was found in a closet, ropes around the neck and genitals and ends of the ropes were tied together.

In the Russian news, the guy was found in the hotel room, ropes around the neck and genitals and the ropes were tied up in the bathroom.

What? Was something lost in translation with the Bangkok authorities? Or does the story sound better one way or the other in different languages?

It’s apparent that there were ropes around his neck and genitals and that asphyxiation was probably the cause of death. But ropes around the genitals? Some sort of sex game gone bad?

You be the judge.

David Carradine in Kung Fu

While vodka is enjoyed for a brief period of time, a mail order bride is enjoyed for a lifetime. Now don’t get me wrong. I like drinking vodka just as much as the next guy. But the vodka buzz (or drunk) only lasts a few hours at a time, and eventually pickles your liver.

A Russian bride on the other hand gives you years of pleasure and love.  She is beautiful, charming and most likely has a career. Russian women grow with a good work ethic. Although, maybe you don’t want her to work. But that’s neither here nor there. She will give you many years of pleasure and love (did I say that already?). 

Russian women are well educated.  As well, they enjoy the finer things in life and even the simple ones. They love the ballet and the opera and they love to go out dancing at clubs. A Russian woman will never be boring. They have a more positive outlook on life and most are very honest. Russian women are looking for a good life with a good man, someone they can take care of. Some Russian brides will even meet you at the door after a hard days work in their birthday suit or the sexiest lingerie they have.

You can’t go wrong with a Russian mail order bride. Although, the occassional few shots of premium vodka doesn’t hurt as well.

Nice article about why Russian women don’t marry Russian men.

Take a look and have a read. As well on the same web site, there is

a fun article - Russian Women At A Glance.

Mel Gibson has jumped on board and got himself a Russian girlfriend - Oksana Grigorieva. Oksana is a 38 year old Russian pop star. Apparently he met her when he signed her to his record label, Icon Records.

Mel Gibson and girlfriend Oksana Grigorieva

Russian pop star Oksana Grigorieva